Dr. Don Deems, the Dentist's Coach - Free Newsletter: Freedom

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Freedom - or Lack Thereof?
December 01, 2009

Get a piece of paper and a pen. Draw a horizontal line from the left to the right. On the left side, label the end of that line "BONDAGE", and on the right side, label the end of the line "FREEDOM".

"Freedom" needs little explanation, but perhaps "bondage" needs a bit more. Simply put, bondage is the lack of freedom. It's what ties you down, keeps you from experiencing what you really want.

Now, place a hash mark on the continuum from left to right where you feel you are in relation to "freedom" or "bondage" for the following elements of your practice:

Your daily schedule
Debt
Savings
Practice growth
Right staff
Daily enjoyment of work
Overhead
Doing the dentistry you want
The type of patients you want
Practice organization
Goals

Now, on another page, repeat the same setup, this time placing a hash mark where you are in relation to "freedom" or "bondage" for the following aspects of your life:

Relationships
Tolerations
Reserves
Boundaries
Spirituality
Physical health
Emotional health
Stress
Anxiety

What do you notice about your answers? How close to freedom are you for each of these aspects of your practice and your life?

Anything that holds us back is robbing us of that feeling of freedom.

Last month I spoke about fear, and how it holds us back, and I encouraged you to be bold. Now I'm asking you to be bold about making changes, decisions, and modifications in your life and practice that move you toward freedom. This, however, may prove daunting. Let me give you a little coaching direction around this.

Somewhere along my life-line, I was taught I could solve anything if I could just think hard enough about it. I was taught that brainpower was supreme. The world taught me that I would be rewarded for possessing great intellectual abilities, so that was my focus.

But there finally came a time in my life that I couldn't solve the problem. I didn't know the answer. And no matter how hard I tried, thought about it, reasoned and rationalized, researched and studied, I did not know the answer. It seemed I was caught in the middle of the proverbial "rock and a hard place."

When you find yourself in these tight spots, or dilemmas, how do you feel? Exalted? Exhilarated? Inspired? We're left with feelings of inferiority, anger, hostility, depression, "less-than." I call it BONDAGE. Often we blame others, say things we don't really mean, and make decisions based upon the 'lesser of two evils'.

Working out of these tight spots, we often leave out the single most powerful asset each and every one of us has: our heart.

When you decide with your heart, it will be the right decision.

In the blockbuster movie Star Wars, young Luke Skywalker is faced with what feels to him is an insurmountable challenge. He doesn't know what to do. He is torn to hang onto what he knows and understands, rather than take a risk which may have consequences he can only be fearful of. Yoda, sensing his troubles, tells the young Luke, "Do or not do. There is no try."

Life constantly changes; we are challenged every day in ways we can neither see or understand. Keeping a tight rein on life in an attempt to control it all is not just overwhelming, it is impossible.
Doing so will keep you in bondage.

I would encourage you to no longer try; do or not do, as Yoda said, and use your most powerful asset - your heart.

Coaching point: What are you feeling in bondage about, right now, at this point in your life? How would trusting your heart provide the right choice for you to move you towards freedom?

Previous article: Fear, Anxiety, and Anger: Ruling (Ruining) Your Life
Next article: The Myth of Success and Failure

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